Are you afraid of the loss of the marriage to your separated spouse? Have your fears come true?
Can a relationship that has crumbled because of infidelity, or turning on each other get back together? The answer may surprise you. Even though there are no guarantees – You can break down the dividing walls between you and your spouse.
Use these 5 powerful keys to getting back together. It has often been done before, and winning his or her heart can be done again, by you.
If you fear the marriage is lost, have been separated, facing divorce, or who have already been divorced keep reading! You will learn specific action steps that will help end the frustration of not knowing how to handle the immensity of this personal and relational crisis.
If you want the relationship sincerely and deeply enough you will give it your all.
Know the “Why”
The best way to increase your chances of making getting back together work is to understand why the relationship failed in the first place.
- Usually men leave because they do not feel admired or respected, “No matter what I do, nothing makes her happy”!
- Usually women leave because they do not feel appreciated or loved, which leads to boredom and resentment, “He just doesn’t appreciate me or anything I do.”
- These “must haves” account for many of the affairs that break up marriages.
- Consider these truths when trying to relate to your spouse.
State your Reasons!
Preparation is key so you can show your ex that you are serious about doing what it takes to win him or her back. It will give you a much better chance if you do the following:
- Look in the Mirror….. Search yourself to get a list all of the positive and negative parts of the relationship and how you can fix it – Be objective and constructive!
- Based on the what you discover, set up a meeting with him or her based on an action plan that will put the ball in his or her court. Tell him or her that you will give him or her all the time they need to think and process through the possibility of working on saving the marriage together.
- Sit down with your ex spouse and tell them your full intentions to get back together. Tell your ex that you want to be part of his or her life and give the full story on why you want this. Also, explain your need to make things right.
- But, you must be clear that you will give him or her the space he or she needs to figure out they want.
However, if you want to “up” your chances of Success having the best up front advice, then the best I know of is from the eBook guide and course of materials called “Magic of Making Up”, by T.W. Jackson. If you are the “willing student” it will help you step into action, and communicate effectively so you can better be able to make up with you ex, and end the heartbreak.
The main focus of this book are strategies that can give you the best fighting chance to reconcile with your ex.
Just imagine the relief and happiness that you could be feeling if you just were able to get back together with your ex. To get started on the course for trying to get back what has been lost to you click the link Getting Back Together
Tom Petty was right. The waiting is the hardest part. But, it is a part of the process. Wait patiently for your spouse to get back to you with his or her thoughts. Be as gentle and patient as possible during this time of waiting.
If your ex was the only one who wanted out of the marriage this candid conversation might help change his or her mind. If it was you who wanted out, then your sincere apology and desire to make atonement for any hurt or offense may make reconciliation easier for your spouse.
Listening to the response of your ex is a simple but difficult part of your goal. You have placed all of your cards on the table and also have to let the chips fall where they lay.
Fully respect his or her feelings. He or she knows your desire to change, and heal the marriage. They now know you want to make things right with a new lease on the marriage.
But, if his or her response is painfully NOT what you want to hear, then do not lose hope just yet. It may feel like it is a big set-back to your goal, but simply listening, without any interruption, can go a long way to start the process of healing the emotional damage of the mistakes that were made in the relationship.
Stalkers Never Prosper
In other words, keep you dignity intact; do not resort to following them around, texting them all the time or all out stalking them. This would be a bad move and will cause your ex and other people to distrust you. Doing this can and will hinder any hopes of reconciliation or gaining new healthy relationships.
No matter who is at fault for the divorce, you or your ex (most often both), these five techniques will help you earn the benefit of the doubt from your separated spouse.
At the very least you will grow as a person, have better chances of relationship success down the road, and you will possibly help your chances of getting the trust of your ex back… along with getting your marriage back.
It is always worth the effort for reconnecting with you ex, knowing how to keep marriage alive, and doing what it takes to help both of you grow together.
Even if your efforts are not successful, and the marriage is not immediately restored — take action anyway.
Demonstrate to your ex spouse your dedication to changing your attitude, way of communicating and most of all… demonstrate your action plans for making up for past hurts.
Do not permanently give up through discouragement; stay positive in the fact that you are getting your life straight. You will be a better person and spouse for having put yourself to the task.
One last thing, if you do get your marriage back again, from then on it is crucial to improve the state of your restored marriage, even when problems no longer are “at play.” These steps are not just critical to the beginning of reconciliation and healing of your marriage, they are vital to the strengthening of your newly restored marriage.
If you have success with your ex – share your success by commenting below. Who knows, your success story may just save marriages too!