One simple way to show that you are becoming more thoughtful for your spouse is to try to start thinking like your spouse. Believe it or not one of the best ways to do that is through the subtle art of reassuring him or her…
Because, even big positive changes in your relationship together can be overwhelming or a little bit scary!!!
For this reason, here is a bonus tip, just for such a situation!
How to Reassure Your Spouse that You Are Not Cheating
If kindness is not the usual thing that you do for your partner, be aware that they may be so alarmed that they may think you are trying to compensate for having an affair, or something equally devastating to a relationship .
It is just plain smart to cover this base. Tact will serve you well when you open up concerning your strong devotion to him or her. Anything less than gentle reassurance may come off as a defense tactic… this defeats your intended purpose, right?
A “Keep Marriage Alive” way to approach your spouse about this could go something like this:
Start off trying to relate to him or her by saying something like,
- “I know that I have been treating you differently than you have experienced in the past and that may seem a bit strange right now.”
Then follow that up with a sincere question, such as,
- “Are you feeling uneasy about the sudden change in the way that I am helping you more, and how I am showing you more consideration?”
Now is the time to gently break out the reassurance that you are not trying to make up for an affair or something else that is extremely damaging to a relationship by saying something along the lines of,
- “Because, from the bottom of my heart, I want to assure you that I am not doing all of these things to try to cover my tail or butter you up for some bad news. I do not want you to wonder or think about me in a way that is not real.”
Follow this up quickly with something like,
- “In case you were wondering, my intentions are truly for the purposes of getting back what our relationship used to have. I want to take our relationship seriously now, and make it better than ever. I want to boost our love life and get back that fire that heated up our marriage!
- Do you think that we can make things better….?
If he or she is staring at you with his or her mouth open, unsure of what to say, then continue on with something like the following.
- “I am asking because I want an amazing marriage with you. And in all of my new efforts to rebuild love again with you, I want to communicate that I am doing these things to build trust. I am not doing these things for some other reason. It may seem unreal how I have changed toward you. I want to assure you that I wouldn’t think of doing anything to betray your trust, now more than ever”!
I know that it is kind of a long speech to give and your version can be a lot shorter and more direct. However, make sure that you are steering them away from any unfounded fears that may have come up due to your efforts to keep marriage alive in your relationship!